A story of one woman’s struggle.

We were doing an outreach project, canvassing a couple of neighbourhoods in greater Vancouver, BC.  The residents of these neighbourhoods were primarily Sikh and Muslim. We were doing some cooperative work with Community of Hope Church, handing out invitation flyers.

On one side of the flyer was church information including service times. On the other side, was an invitation to a children’s program that we were hosting in their neighbourhood park. Although they could see that it was a Christian program from the flyer, our hope was that they would give it a shot for their kids to have some fun.

It worked! The following evening we hosted the first children’s program at the park and our team had a great time seeing the fruit of our canvassing efforts. There were a bunch of stations including games, arts and crafts, face-painting and then a soccer area for some of the bigger kids. It was a buzz of activity, and I thoroughly enjoyed watching our team, mostly made up of teenagers, serve these neighbourhoods!

Then a conversation shifted my focus.

I had been taking some video footage and photos to be compiled when I got back home. I had just put the video camera back in the bag when all of a sudden I was cornered by a young East Indian woman. Without as much as a hello, she immediately asked me a question.

“If I follow God, why do I still have so much struggle and pain?“

“Wow,” I thought, “obviously, I’m going to be here a while!” She had brought her two kids and as they ran off to play, I decided we better pull up a couple of chairs and listen to her story.

This young woman had sought truth for many years although she was raised Sikh. She had questioned Sikhism for many years, expressing how crazy it seemed to pray to pictures, paintings or idols, which is typical within much of East Indian faith tradition. She started to search for something else.

Eventually, she was drawn to Christianity and wanted to know more about it. She was seeking answers to big questions and found the best answers within the Christian faith. While on this journey of questions and answers, her husband chose to leave her and her children. In turn (as is typical within Indian culture) her family and friends ignored the situation, not giving her the care she needed.

She was abandoned because she questioned Sikhism.

Her journey continued, seeking out answers, striving to find out which faith position made the most sense. Eventually, she was faced with the decision to accept the Gospel. And she did; she had accepted Christ six months prior to our conversation. This was amazing to hear, and she was thankful that she had found Jesus, but her life got a lot more difficult after that moment.

When she fully embraced Christianity, she also rejected all the idol-worship of her culture. This decision widened the gap to a point of no return. She was now an outcast within her circle of friends and family and her greater community. And now, she has nowhere to turn and no support.

She explained that on top of the faith journey, she still has the regular struggles of being a single mom. Her children misbehave often; they don’t listen to correction or discipline. She constantly feels overwhelmed and worried that she’s not being an adequate mother. And of course, she carries deep loneliness, longing for a husband and a father for her children.

Then she met some Christians.

At first, I was encouraged to hear that she had made some connections with other believers. That was until I heard their advice on her situation. Her Christian friends told her that she wasn’t praying enough, and not reading her Bible enough. If she does that more, she’ll find the joy of the Lord. This frustrated me.

My mind was swimming with thoughts. Although I understood what these fellow Believers were trying to say, it didn’t land well. Drawing closer to Jesus through prayer and Scripture will always be helpful, but this isn’t a magic antidote to remove all pain and heartache. Life is complicated, and life can hurt, even when we have a close relationship with Christ. And for this woman, literally because of her relationship with Christ.

Too often, we give an inadequate picture of what the Gospel is really all about. Jesus made it very clear in the Gospel accounts, as did the authors of the New Testament, that following Him would be difficult. This is what it means to “take up your cross” mean? (Lk. 9:23)

We need to be careful when giving new Believers advice. The Church should not preach a “come to Jesus and everything will be rosy” message. It’s a false Gospel. The reality is that following Christ in Western culture is difficult enough. I can’t even begin to imagine how terribly isolated one would feel following Christ in Eastern culture.

I needed to give her an answer.

There I was, still paused, processing my response. I realized that I was going to be the first Christian to fill her in on the fact that life gets difficult when we follow Jesus. I knew that she had minimal Biblical knowledge, so I needed to explain this carefully. I didn’t want to speak with Christianese rhetoric to the point she’s left more confused than when we started our conversation.

As I searched my heart for how to explain her struggle, the Lord provided a solution. He reminded me of Donald Miller‘s principles surrounding Story. I repeated his thoughts, telling her to imagine a movie where all the characters have perfect lives, never struggling or feeling pain. At the end of the movie, all the characters retire with loads of money, and perfect families and continue to live happily ever after.

Then I asked whether or not she would like that movie? She made the connection right away, replying “No, I would not like that movie.” Immediately followed by, “That is a good example!”

She understood the connection between experiencing pain, conflict and struggle, and living a story worth telling. We discussed this concept a little more, which brought her courage and deepened her faith a little more. We prayed, then we returned to watch the children’s activities.

Then God provided affirmation.

About this time, an intern with Community of Hope Church called all the children and parents over for storytime. It was the story of Joseph. I couldn’t believe it; how perfect! Joseph was a man who experienced pain and struggles throughout his entire life, yet continued to follow God through each step of his journey. I could not have chosen a better story for this young woman to hear.

After the program, as we were driving home, one of the members of our team commented on how there was this young woman who was really engaged with the Bible story; how she was really paying attention. He explained.

“It was like she was hanging on every word! She was smiling and nodding her head as the intern explained all the tests and trials that Joseph faced.“

This woman could relate. After so much pain and loneliness, this young woman finally had validation for her suffering. “God’s plan is so perfect!” I thought to myself.

Later on, I explained what had happened, and the connection to the woman listening intently to the Bible story. It gave me an opportunity to teach our team about God’s sovereign ability to weave multiple stories into every moment of our lives. That His plan is so diverse that a children’s event in a park would end up being a crucial moment in a woman’s faith journey. Yet another layer unfolded in the hearts and minds of our team, as their faith deepened from the experience.

Join the Conversation, Leave Your Thoughts

• Why do you think God requires personal sacrifice in order to follow Jesus?
• How have you experienced hardship in your faith journey?