When’s the last time you were rebuked?

In Leviticus 9 we get one of the earliest indications on how we should be rebuking each other. As you read this passage, consider the concept of motive.

“Do not hate a fellow Israelite in your heart. Rebuke your neighbor frankly so you will not share in their guilt. Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against anyone among your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD.’” (Lev. 19:17-18)

There are a few things that should come to mind when we read these verses. First, we shouldn’t hate our neighbours. Pretty straightforward but maybe not as easy to practice, depending on who your neighbour is. Then again, who is our neighbour? Perhaps the right approach is that we shouldn’t hate anyone.

Then consider the next statement; it gets interesting. Don’t hate, but continue with a rebuke? Does this fit in our modern context?

What’s really going on here?

Why would God inspire Moses to write instructions on rebuking our neighbour, right after instruction to not hate our neighbour? Perhaps I’m off base here, but this passage seems to indicate that we should be willing to rebuke our neighbour to prevent hate. That rebuke and relationship are connected somehow?

The passage continues with not seeking revenge and not holding a grudge. Instead, we should be loving as unto ourselves. This means, that even in the Old Testament Law, signs seem to point to rebuking as part of loving someone. The unique part for me in all this is how pertinent this passage should be to our current Western culture.

Let’s face it, we’re taught from a young age to ignore those people who cause us to struggle (or hate, if we want to go that far). We’re taught to avoid them, don’t interact with them, cut them off, and act as though they don’t exist. You would never make the effort to rebuke them, with the goal of maintaining the relationship. It sounds completely counter-cultural in our world today, but we need to embrace this!

Consider work settings.

As adults, in a work environment, we’ll distance ourselves or avoid that co-worker who gets under our skin. This is when the rebuke becomes such a baffling concept. Who in their right mind would go rebuke a person in their life, who they can’t stand to even look at? Who in their right mind would openly get into a discussion about that person’s behaviour or actions?

In today’s western world, our ‘I’m okay, you’re okay’ society is full of people who really aren’t okay. But discussing this and addressing conflicts seems ludicrous. Nevertheless, according to this passage, it’s a step in the right direction to not hating a person.

I’ve been rebuked a lot.

Don’t feel sorry for me. I deserved it, and in the end, it’s always been a growing experience. For those who know me, or as I’ve stated in previous posts, I’m a fairly vocal guy. I’m vocal about my faith, my work, my hobbies and just about anything I even remotely care about in life.

I’ve also talked a lot about my love for Peter. I enjoy envisioning him, or perhaps, myself as him, struggling in similar ways. I can connect with a disciple who keeps speaking and acting impetuously. I’m a 0-to-60 kind of guy in most scenarios. Peter seems to resemble that, at least in his earlier years of ministry, so his trials resonate with me.

3 Types of Rebuke:

As someone who has been rebuked frequently throughout my life, I have come to realize the difference between certain types of rebuke. There are three definite categories, all stemming from motive, that I’d like to highlight.

Motive #1: Disdain

These people can’t stand me. They simply want to put me in my place and walk away. There is no desire for a relationship and there likely never was. The rebuke is cold and distant, which feels more like a wound that’s been inflicted than advice to help me grow.

Motive #2: Friendship

This is usually an acquaintance or maybe even a friend, but they’re quite annoyed by the thing I am saying and doing at that moment. Ultimately, however, they want to maintain and even foster the relationship. The rebuke is firm but caring; it may sting a bit, but ultimately helpful.

Motive #3: Love

This is typically a good friend or mentor, who can see past my struggles and insecurities. They want me to overcome my weaknesses, not for their benefit, but to help me become more like Jesus. The rebuke is filled with hope for my future in Christ.

Rebuke begins with motive.

As you can see, the power and traction of a rebuke are primarily centred on the motive of the person issuing it. The process in which a rebuke takes place, and the words used, will all flow out of the motive behind the rebuke. To check our motive, we should consider Jesus’ instruction in Matthew 7:

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” (Matt. 7:3-5)

I firmly believe that rebuking and being rebuked is a part of life. A healthy one, outlined in Scripture for our well-being. Let’s not get so stubborn, anxious, or complacent not to embrace this important principle of our faith.

Join the Conversation, Leave Your Thoughts

• What happened the last time you experienced rebuke?
• How was it given; with what motive?
• How did you receive it?